Meaf's Adventures Abroad

It could be argued that the following account and the accompanying pictures should come with an explicit content warning. However, the Kanamura festival is an ancient Shinto fertility rite, not b-rate porn. I should also clarify *no homo!* because the following will no doubt come across as homosexual no matter what I write. I heard of the festival a few days before I went. And really, if you heard there was a penis-fest happening in your area, wouldn`t you go too? How could I miss such an event? So after getting a late start (I was supposed to meet up with some other foreigners) and some aimless wandering around the wrong train station taking photos of the sakura (cherry blossoms,) I made it to Kawasakidaisho where the festival takes place annually. I followed the crowd to a magnificient temple complex which was strangely devoid of phalli. I say strangely because I was expecting to see them everywhere. I did notice a few women enjoying 6-inch candy delights in the shape of the male anatomy, but that was about it. Where were all the dicks? Somewhat disappointed by the lack of carnivalesque revelry I had anticipated, I snapped a bunch of photos and bought myself some candy-cocks and vaginas to give as gifts to my friends with a sense of humour. However, as I made my way back to the station I could hear some chanting. So I followed the sound to crowd-filled street. There were people dressed in Edo-period costumes (pre-industrial Japan) and costumed figures everywhere. And lo and behold! A giant penis being paraded down the street on the backs of maybe 20 sweaty men and women, who not only marched, but danced their way down the avenue. The shrine looked very heavy given that they constantly needed steering by men not bearing the load and how often the convey changed its members. All the way they chanted, what I believe means `penis, penis, penis` and the crowd was encouraging them inbetween snapping photographes and gulping down lager. Trailing behind the penis, was the little penis. Little penis you say? That was their representation of the vagina/clitoris. A small penis placed in front of what appeared to be a tree trunk. Do your own research. It too was carried by a mixed-gendered troop but due to its smaller size and seemingly relatively light-weight, the bearers stopped several times to perform a crazy teeter-totter trick where the shrine was balanced on shoulders of the centre-men and the people in the outer positions took turns leaping into the air, rocking the shrine with tremendous ferocity. What purpose this served other than to entertain, I do not know. The last shrine, if it can be called that, was carried by the transgender/transvestite group. It took the form of a massive pink schlong, without the encasement that the previous two shrines had. It was certainly a crowd-pleaser, both for its shock-value (both the shrine and the transgenders who carried it) and as a great photographic opportunity.